not in the mood...

...i started my new year right naman... everythin' went fine... i was able to spent it w/ my family and luv ones... but today... i dunno.... nde maganda gising koh... kaninang umaga pah.... from d' mornin' i woke up... walah na akoh sa mood.... kanina... i woke up kinda late... cuz i slept late na ren cuz of d' new year celebration... kaninang umaga sabi koh ba't 'la akoh sa mood?... ang choices lang don... a. kulang akoh sa tulog b. gutom akoh c. magkakaroon akoh... well like i said... i slept late so yeah kulang akoh sa tulog... and yeah i was hungry too cuz earlier i didn't eat anythin' when i left home cuz i woke up late nah and i had to hurry so i won't be late to work... but magkakaroon? dat i dunno yet... but yeah kung magkakaroon akoh tlagang mainit uloh koh.... when i got to work.. i asked my co-worker to make meeh coffee to start my day... i paid for it already n everythin'... tapos nung kukunin koh nah eh she haven't make it cuz bz daw syah... eh kc naman inuna pa nyah 'ung customer eh nauna akoh kaya don... hay! ayon... nag-init uloh koh eh mag-sstart na 'ung shift koh... so yeah dat moment... gutom akoh... and i also needed coffee so bad.. i had a muffin but dat wasn't enough... cuz i had no coffee... i wasn't able to drink coffee until two hours after i started my shift... syempre sa harap nang customers i gotta smile and pretend i was fine... but i wasn't fine... even 'ung mga co-workers koh natatarayan koh nah... i wasn't even smilin' a lot like my usual.. not so friendly as well.... pero kinda bz kanina so i guess dehinz nilah ganoh pansin... naiinis akoh sa mood koh.... actually my mood today were all mixed: i was feelin' grumpy, mean, unfriendly, upset, depressed, down, sad.... ewan koh... around afternoon that was when i became depressed... i was feelin' down, and feelin' upset for no reason... durin' my lunch... i dunno i juz felt sad... i ate a sandwich...after dat i was feelin' d' same thing... feelin' so low.. i wanted to read d' book dat i brought to work... but didn't feel like readin' it... oh yeah i didn't have my cellphone w/ meeh too cuz i left it at home'... then i wanted to write somethin'... pero i didn't have a pen w/ meeh dat moment in d' breakroom... i was lazy to get up and get a pen... so ayon... nagpa-ka-upset lalo... then back to work... we were really bz... ayon... mejo naputol ang pagiging emo koh... pansamantalang nalimutan koh ang sarili koh cuz there was so much things to do... and yeah cuz we were bz... then uwian time.... i was on d' way home... i was feelin' sad... and depressed... and down.... na ewan.... when i got home... dahil nde koh maintindihan ang nararamdaman koh... kumain akoh... i guess i was hungry too... but still my mood was still on d' down low... feeling koh maiiyak akoh nah nde koh maintindihan... then i went to my room.. my ate was there and using the laptop... tapos nakita koh pa mejo magulo ang room koh cuz ginulo na naman nang pamangkin koh... nag-init na naman ulo koh... she was talkin' to meeh but i don't feel like answerin' back... i either ignored some of her questions or i juz answered it w/ a one word phrase... dat wasn't a usual meeh.... ewan koh bah... then my niece came up to meeh and also was askin' meeh a question.. i juz ignored her... tapos... nilakasan nyah boses nyah... sabi koh nabibingi akoh... then after that she was like...oh ok you dunno.... since walah akong sinasabi syah na sumagot nang tanong nyah.. then i went to watched dvd w/ her... but still wasn't in the mood... but it was sweet of her tumabi sya saken at binigyan akoh nang blanket nyah.. but i was only there for few minutes... bumalik akoh ditoh sa room koh at nag-changed...tapos humiga sa bed at nag-emote at nag-pretend to be sleepin'... then my ate asked me kung matutulog na akoh... nde akoh sumagot... maya maya... she left nah and went to her room w/ my other niece... finally nagamit koh ang computer... i have my dim light... my music is on... nasa bed at nakakumot... i guess still not in d' mood... i guess kelangan koh lang itulog... i hate diz feeling'... but... kahit 'la akoh sa mood... mag-pray bago matulog... so yeah...i'll get ready to sleep nah... GODBLESS! -di